For many women, menopause signals a new and sometimes confronting chapter. Hormonal changes, shifting moods, sleep disruptions, vaginal dryness and a loss of libido are just a few of the common symptoms that come knocking – often uninvited. But what if the answer to managing some of these challenges was right at your fingertips? Literally…
Enter mensturbation – the empowering idea that self-pleasure during menopause isn’t just okay, but essential.
As oestrogen and testosterone decline, it’s easy to feel like your body has turned on you. But, Christine Rafe, Sex and Relationship Expert for Womanizer, explains that pleasurable activities like masturbation and orgasm can spark the release of “happy hormones” such as dopamine, oxytocin and endorphins. “These hormones support mood and wellbeing, and reduce cortisol levels (our stress hormone), therefore supporting hormonal balance,” she says. While it won’t directly raise oestrogen, orgasm has been shown to temporarily increase testosterone – boosting libido, energy and mood, all of which can take a hit in menopause.
One major menopause concern is pelvic floor weakening, which can contribute to incontinence and prolapse. But solo sex may help. “Orgasm is the involuntary rhythmic contraction of the pelvic floor,” says Rafe. “These contractions can strengthen the muscles.” Add in improved circulation from increased blood flow to the pelvic region and you’ve got a prescription for better long-term pelvic health – and it’s far more fun than Kegels.
Vaginal atrophy and dryness are common due to lower oestrogen, but regular arousal and stimulation can help. “When we become aroused… blood flow to our vulva, vagina and whole pelvic region increases,” Rafe explains. “This supports tissue health, elasticity and lubrication.” Think of it as a form of exercise for your vaginal tissues, helping to prevent discomfort and micro-tearing.
Hot flashes and insomnia got you tossing and turning? Try touching instead. Masturbation before bed may help lower cortisol and increase calming hormones like prolactin, oxytocin and melatonin. A recent study funded by the Womanizer Pleasure Fund found that using sex toys led to a 59% reduction in tiredness and sleep disturbances for menopausal women. Sweet dreams indeed.
Solo pleasure doesn’t just light up your body – it lights up your brain. “Orgasm triggers the release of dopamine, oxytocin, endorphins and serotonin,” says Rafe, “activating the brain’s reward system and promoting feelings of happiness and satisfaction.” The same study found that sex toy users reported higher body confidence and better mental health during menopause. Yes, feeling sexy again is possible – and it starts with you.
Menopause can leave women feeling like strangers in their own bodies. But masturbation offers a path back to sensual self-awareness. Rafe recommends starting slow: “Reconnect with your body through non-sexual touch or movement, then gently reintroduce sensual practices.” From there, mindful masturbation can help rebuild your relationship with pleasure – and yourself.
Still experiencing irregular and painful periods during perimenopause? Masturbation can offer genuine relief. “Endorphins released during orgasm act as natural painkillers,” Rafe notes, adding that they may ease headaches, cramps, and even joint pain. Your vibrator might just become your new go-to for more than just pleasure.
Wondering how often you should be masturbating? Don’t. “There’s no such thing as ‘normal’,” says Rafe. “The key is quality. Every time you experience pleasure, you benefit.” It’s not about performance – it’s about connection and feeling good in your body, however often that may be.
For many women raised in sex-negative cultures, masturbation can still feel taboo. Rafe suggests reframing it as a wellness tool. “If ‘pleasure is my birthright’ feels too much, try ‘I can support my happy hormones through pleasurable activities’,” she says. Start with small, self-loving acts like a massage or long bath, and build from there. “Show yourself you deserve nice things – and that includes sexual pleasure.”
If you’re ready to explore, Rafe recommends always using lubricant – especially as oestrogen drops and tissues become thinner. Penetration isn’t necessary to experience satisfaction. In fact, less than 20% of women climax through penetration alone. “Focus on external clitoral stimulation through hands, oral sex, or toys like the Womanizer Enhance,” she advises. “Build a sexual menu that centres your pleasure.”
So, to all the midlife mavens out there navigating menopause: don’t just endure it. Explore it. Rediscover your pleasure, your power and your body – on your own terms.
This story was originally published on The Carousel.
